


Volatile Times

by BarksOfTheHeart



Category: Carmilla (Web Series)
Genre: F/F, Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-10-20
Updated: 2017-03-27
Packaged: 2018-08-23 13:12:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 9,962
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8329198
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BarksOfTheHeart/pseuds/BarksOfTheHeart
Summary: Four very different (or so they think) individuals come together when they tragically discover they possess unusual powers. They are taken to an Academy where they find more like them. Additionally, this Academy is where they exactly discovered how they were meant to be found and - you guessed it - for each other.Pretty much the one where everyone has unusual powers of nature and have to take a chill pill to control their powers and combat the unspeakable evil surrounding them with some deep, deep romance on the side.





	1. Look at me, what have I become? (I am lost)

**Author's Note:**

> I have been working on this for as long as I can remember. I had the final draft ready for almost a year and never published it. Looking over notes and procrastinating, I found the gem, completed it and decided to pick it up. Let me know what you all think!

She's tired of running. It’s always fun at the beginning, but it always takes a dark turn. Even looking back to take a few glances reminded her of why she learned it was best not to all too well. Her mind was wandering, but she had to keep running because the guy behind her isn’t giving up on her. He was supposed to give up by the park. He has for the past few days, but apparently not this time.  


It all started a couple of blocks away from Central Park, when she took a hot dog from the vendor giving him only a quarter and a few pennies -- nothing close to what a New York hot dog costs for that matter. It was a slow day at the plaza she usually stationed at, and she already spent the money she had before on other things. Greg wasn’t working tonight to provide her with her pity dinner, as she calls it—even though she could just _tell_ him. Dominic doesn’t know the drill. In all honesty, she enjoys the thrill and spitting the new guy, but it was quite embarrassing, because stealing just reminds her of the harder times she had to overcome on the streets. Something she didn’t _have_ to do anymore, but still couldn’t let go.  


She is tired of running and the meaning it holds for her. Running away _from_ and _for_ her life. Running away from what she once called home. Running away in fear. Running away holds such a traumatizing meaning to her. So, other than embarrassing, it just meant reliving that moment all over again. She stopped on her tracks just as she was getting into Strawberry Fields, and realized how far she actually got—which was very far. She takes a deep breath and turns back to _really_ look at what’s behind her, something she hasn’t done in quite a long time.  


“Hey, you…stay…right…” Dominic—at least that’s what she thinks his name is—dropped to the floor completely out of breath and it is safe to assume he’s not getting up any time soon. It strikes her that she’s given the opportunity to escape again, but she shrugs that thought off. She already made a decision to not run away anymore.  


She approaches Dominic and offers him a hand, to which he scowls at first but eventually takes and gets up. She looks at the silly name tag pinned on his greasy shirt and—yes, his name is Dominic. “You tired today?” The words barely came out, but at least he didn’t look as shaken.  


“I’m always tired,” she says shrugging. She really is.  


“Well, I’m not gonna lie, I’m impressed. Today I wanted to see how far you actually got, so I can know for next time.” He gives her a hint of a smile while still straightening up. She decides right then that Dominic is not as bad as she thought.  


“I could have kept on running.” A smug, but small smile crosses her face. She’s so used to it, she could run for miles on end.  


“But you didn’t.” But she didn’t. She doesn’t want to anymore.  


“Right.” She drops the black string bag on her back, opens it and tries to retrieve the wrapped hot dog she stole and gives it to Dominic. “Here. I don’t think there’ll be a next time.” However, he rejects it, causing her to frown in confusion.  


“I’m not saying you deserve it, but you clearly need it.” He’s giving her that look. She knows that look all too well.  


“Oh, I don’t want your pity if that’s what you mean.” He’s not Greg, and he’s not accepting that from any other guy.  


“You accept Greg’s pity though.” The word only sounds good in her mouth and in her mind. It’s not the kind of pity he thinks, and it sounds so wrong on someone else’s mouth. Maybe she should come up with a different word.  


“But he’s Greg. And you are Dominic.” His smile grew at the mention of his name.  


“And what’s your name?” Not many people got to hear her name or knew who she really was. A new employee like Dominic could only guess that she’s a girl on the streets that comes around looking for food every other night. Someone working longer could say she’s even Greg’s daughter. None of them are true though. It’s more complicated than that.  


“Carmilla.” She utters with a sigh.  


“Well _, Carmilla_ , how about this one goes on me? Because you beat me here.” Dominic is not much older than Carmilla, and she can see his change of posture now that he’s recovered. He’s trying to flirt with her and—no—that needed to stop.  


“I always beat you.” She puts a hand on his shoulder, pats it lightly and shakes her head hoping he gets the hint. Greg must have told him about this though, because he quickly pouts in realization, letting out a silent _well shit_ . Carmilla liked Greg, and she is starting to like Dominic too.  


“For the last time you make me sweat like this then?” Carmilla once again refuses and tries to give him the hot dog, and Dominic takes it, but puts it on Carmilla’s bag himself shaking his head.  


He has a different look on his face. It’s something she can’t quite place, but it looks a little like sympathy. It can’t be it though. That look comes rare in time, especially if it’s not from Greg. Nobody has sympathy for a _monster_ , but she won’t fight it. Carmilla is trying new things. “Alright. That’s something I can work with.”

 

\--

 

“Perry, it’s over.” She felt someone shaking her from her daze, but it was still too blurry. “Perr?” A sad smile automatically spreads on her face. Of course it was them. It is hard to face reality these days, and it is getting to the point where even LaFontaine struggles to bring her back. They have been her ground ever since she can remember, but this time it wasn’t only a hand but multiple trying to pull her apart and-- “Perr! Are you here?” Perry blinks a few times, and she can feel her feet on the ground again.  


“Yes, sorry.”  


LaF still has a worried look on their face and it’s burning her. Perry has to look away and around to get another grasp of reality. There’s not a big clump of black surrounding her anymore, so she is able to see the different colored flowers instead. She never understood the concept of funeral flowers. For the longest time she thought funeral flowers were morbid. They’re also living beings that eventually perish, and that confused her. Funerals are sad—extremely sad, she concluded—and she never understood the reason behind them, until today. Flowers represent love, sympathy, respect, she could feel it now. She realized that each color and each flower had a different message.  


A vast majority of the flowers consist of red, yellow and pink roses, the most common array to say _you are loved and respected—you were loved and respected_ . There are a few crocuses, which she was told they represent cheerfulness, accurate too. And also daffodils and orchids from various acquaintances. Together they make a really pretty garden and arrangement in the face of grief and loss. It all makes more sense now.  


LaFontaine went with Perry to buy separate flowers for her to put. They knew about the meaning of funeral flowers—they were the first one to tell her about that—and while Perry just spaced out at the shop, they picked out the flowers out accordingly, handed them to her, and she didn’t let go of those until she had to. A pink carnation and two white roses.  


She was leaving reality again, but this time she feels hands on her face and blue eyes facing hers. They resemble the sky she was drifting up to, and she would much rather get lost in those. “Perr, come back to me, please.” So she starts to do so.  


“I—I’m here.” She’s shaking now, and tears are prickling the corner of her eyes. It’s enough sign for LaF to tug her into a tight hug, holding her down. “I don’t know how to do this.” She broke down in their arms and grabbed them even tighter against her.  


“It’s okay—it’s going to be okay.” Perry has heard this line many, many times these past couple of days. The only person she actually took those words from was LaF, but right now it’s just hard. She finds it hard to believe. She hates herself for thinking it will not be okay. She hates herself for the guilt she’s feeling right now. A guilt she doesn’t understand but very much plagues her whole body.  


“I know.” She doesn’t believe that for a second.

 

\--

 

_“Did you hear about what happened to the swimming team?”_

_“But what could have made that mess?”_

_“Obviously this university has some weird creature hidden on campus.”_

_“Ashley, it’s a pool, not a lake. So it can’t be some Loch Ness Monster crap.”_

_“I heard it was caused by one of their own.”_  
  


Every single class today is talking about the swimming team fiasco, and Laura is beyond done. She’s the only one that got out unharmed from the situation, but apparently she’s also the one who caused it. But not everyone knows that, and she hopes nobody else picks up on that story. She doesn’t even understand it herself.  


She’s trying to listen to the case study being presented on her ethics class. Not that it’s entirely amusing, but her professor is the only one in that room talking about something else other than _the incident_ .  


_“Laura Hollis, that’s the name of the girl.”_  
  


She felt a shiver go all the way down her spine. She really needed to tune out those conversations right now. It’s good that she doesn’t know anyone in this class—or that she hasn’t made any friends yet—it’s only been a few weeks on her first semester of university. Way to give a first impression. Laura looked at her phone for the tenth time in twenty minutes. _Time really_ is _a funny thing. It moves slowly whenever one needs it to flash by_ , Laura thought. Time is cruel. Time is playing her and she doesn’t appreciate it one bit.  


“We will finish this next class.” Once Professor Baltimore says the words, Laura flies out of the room and searches for her cap in her backpack—which has her _“Marauders Swimming Team”_ tag dangling. _Great_ . She quickly snaps it off and hides it. She also pulls out her sunglasses and puts them on. It’s the longest walk across campus she’s had since her first day. Thousands of eyes feel like they’re on her the entire time, even though probably ninety percent of those had no idea.  


It all seems to go according to plan until someone stops her on her tracks.  


“Laura!” She can’t hide anymore, so she pulls up her sunglasses to look at the curious girl in front of her and nodding in the process. She’s actually _really_ pretty. She's been noticing that about a lot of girls lately. However, that’s the last thing she should be thinking of right now. This girl is not probably on the same page. “I heard about what happened to the team. Are you okay?” She recognizes her then and a light blush spreads on her face. It’s Sarah Jane, from her English class. Sarah Jane, from her residence floor. SJ, her friend.  


“I think so.”  


“People are talking a lot about you, you know?” Laura realizes the middle of campus is probably not the best place to talk about this, so she moves to the nearest tree and SJ follows.  


“What are they saying?” She knows what everyone is talking about. But nobody has come to her and actually say any of the things she’s heard to her face. Maybe college isn't that different from high school after all, which is extremely disappointing.  


“Well…you’re the only one without a broken limb, so everyone is saying that…” SJ stops and Laura becomes flustered too quickly. She can feel her eyes burn looking at SJ, and she can also see a glimpse of the look her whole team had that day—she’s afraid of her.  


Laura deflates with a groan and thinks carefully of what to say to not make SJ run for her life. “You can tell me.” She tries as softly as she can.  


“They’re saying you’re a… _freak_ . That it’s your fault?” SJ sounds unsure, but her look says otherwise, and it pierces through Laura’s chest.  


“I’m not a freak,” Laura spats bitterly, even though she’s doubtful as well.  


“I’m not saying you are. I’m repeating what everyone else is saying.” She’s probably saying it too.  


“Are _you_ saying it?” She’s becoming more irritated by the second, and she can feel her hands itching, so she tucks them into her pockets.  


“Calm down, Laura. I’m not. I’m just hearing.”  


“Why do I not believe you?” She doesn’t know where this flash of anger is coming from, but she guesses that having one of her only friends on campus go against her is a little upsetting. Yes, the anger is completely justified.  


“Laura…” SJ starts firmly. Laura already saw the way she was looking at her. It’s obvious she’s talking about her too. “What happened there?” Very obvious.  


“I don’t have time for this. I have a class in ten minutes.” She’s starting to walk off when SJ grabs her wrist. The itchiness in her hands becomes more intense, and she takes a long, deep breath before turning around. “What?”  


“I don’t want to believe what everyone is saying, Laura. It’s just—you haven’t talked to me, or anyone in the past few days and—I mean—it’s like you’re hiding or something.”  


Laura tenses and takes another deep breath. It’s true; she’s been ignoring everyone since the incident. But the problem is that _everyone_ wants to talk about it, and talking about it makes it real. It was indeed her fault, but she still couldn’t understand it herself. She had no clue what got into her that day, or ever _since_ that day. No one had answers, they all had questions. Making it real isn’t going to help her right now, so she’s not having this conversation yet. “I really need to go to class, SJ. I’ll talk to you later?”  


“Sure.” She could feel the unsteadiness of the word in the back of her neck when she was a few feet away from her friend, clearly unsure. SJ was definitely talking about her too.

 

\--

 

“I heard Dom went soft on you yesterday.” Greg calls as Carmilla is approaching to the register. She’s sweaty and thirsty from the past hour, she moved around more than usual. It did give her good money, so she’s not complaining. “I thought I was your only guy.”  


“Oh—you know—the more guys I can have in the palm of my hand the better.” She grabs one of the display water bottles sitting on the stand and drinks it in big gulps, scowling at how warm it is, but it’s what she needed nonetheless. Greg, on the other hand, laughs audibly. It’s so easy to talk and joke with him, even though he’s a middle-aged man with a bushy mustache. He’s the owner of one of the best fast food joints in Manhattan. They are famous by their specials and their mysterious papaya drinks—which, when Carmilla thought about it, she really craved one right now. “What does this girl need to do to get one of those papaya specials?” She doesn’t know what it actually has; neither Greg wants to ever tell her, but it was definitely one of her favorite things. Without responding, he’s already pouring two glasses. It’s a good day.  


“Because you managed to wrap yet another guy around your finger.” They both clink glasses and take a gulp. “Is it as easy with girls?” Carmilla almost chokes on her drink this time and suppresses a smirk.  


“I wish.”  


“Maybe you could use some of your other charms on them.”  


“Like what?”  


“Well, you are so damn smart kiddo!”  She really is. More than she gives herself credit for.  


She was smart enough to escape to the big city, where she’d be particularly hard to find. She found a job in the first place she could find - with Greg. He didn’t know her story for a while - and he still doesn’t know it completely to this day. But when he found out, he and his wife were kind enough to help her. That time she was lucky more than she was smart. She was lucky she found these people.  


Eventually they told her to apply for college because she was a valedictorian and she deserved way more than selling hot dogs and juice in her life. However, even though she is smart and lucky, she’s also afraid - petrified. She didn’t want to be found. That is why she backed out from her offer to Columbia University when she got the acceptance letter.  


She is petrified and also a little paranoid. That is why she keeps a low profile with everything she does, including probably the other thing she’s really good at - dancing. She is smart, lucky, petrified and a great dancer. Sometimes, when she loses herself, it feels like a dream. But most of the time it’s a nightmare. That is why she runs.  


She’s trying to change that. Today she doesn’t feel like running, so she embraces the moment. “It takes more than saying the right things to get them.”  


“But you know about doing the right things as well, I’m sure.”  


“Not that easy, Greg.” They have had this conversation before in different approaches. No matter how many times Greg tried, Carmilla wasn’t convinced she deserved anyone anytime soon.  


“Alright, you’re right.” He pauses, “let’s toast for this complicated world and the women living in it.”  


“Women indeed.” They clink glasses. Today she doesn’t want to run, and she feels in control. Days like these are harder to experience, so she tries to laugh and enjoy as much as she can.

 

\--

 

They don’t let go of Perry’s hand at all. They convinced their parents and Perry’s family to take her for a ride. A long needed ride around town, because no one else seemed to get through her, and she didn’t move unless they did. Even LaF is starting to doubt their abilities to get through Perry.  


It has been at least an hour, because every ten minutes—like clockwork—LaF asks the same question, and this is probably the sixth time. “Do you want to stop somewhere?” They have gotten a variety of responses. Perry has squeezed their hand, shaken her head, let out shaky sighs, everything but a sign of confirmation, so they just kept on driving.  


This time, however, after a long minute of silence, “Can we go and sit on our bench?” She meant the park, and they were not very far either, so all they do is take a detour to the left and backtrack to their place.  


They get out of the car and get a glimpse of Perry clumsily trying to straighten her dress and hair—which was completely loose on her bun, so there was no fix on that one. They offered their hand once again and she took it instantly. Every time it felt as if they were holding the world--which in theory they were--but they were holding Perry's sorrow as well. She has always been _their_ anchor growing up, and this sudden change is hitting them the more they hold her hand. They were not used to Perry being the one to hold, and it was heartbreaking.  


"I keep replaying everything in my head and it doesn't make sense." It comes out so soft LaF almost doesn't hear it.  


"You don't have to do that Perr." They grab her other hand and stroke their thumbs on them, hoping to bring her at least the tiniest comfort. This bench is one of their favorite places on the planet.  


"I do. For one reason or another, something in me caused this, and I still don't get what that is." LaF gets it, they really do. They haven't told Perry about that night. They were going to tell her, but then other things got in the way. They shouldn't call it that. No death gets _in the way_ . LaF needs to stop their brain before they blurt out something stupid like that.  


"What do you think it is?" Maybe she could help them understand as well.  


"I just--fire. That's all I see. Everything else is beyond my understanding of what is normal."  


"So you're saying something supernatural?" They have tried to explain it with science. They have tried to go through Perry's case, which they don't have much of since she isn't exactly being open about it. But they have also tried to explain it themselves. Nothing logical though. It was frustrating. Mostly because they really wanted to help Perry. "Was someone else in there?"  


"No. I told you this." She gives them a stern look and LaF shifts on their seat.  


"What else could you tell me Perr? I'm trying to find an explanation myself, but I need more details."  


"I can't. I don't remember."  


Their heart feels heavy, and they feel guilty. LaF shouldn't be questioning her right now. Perry is in such a vulnerable place, and she's repressing a horrible trauma. They can't trigger her. "I'm sorry."  


"No, sweetie, it's okay." It's not. Nothing is okay. The weight of it all is hitting them. "I wish I could tell you more."  


"Please don't. I don't want to make you relive that night."  


"I don't want to either, but how else are we going to get answers?" _We_ —maybe they should tell her. Maybe it'd be easier if they had both cases that could possibly make her connect the dots—no—they're pushing it again. They can't do that.  


But their mind is racing again, and before LaFontaine can stop it, the words are out in a breath, "You're not the only one." Perry seems to be heating up, there's no other explanation as to why LaF feels their hands burn all of the sudden. They let go of her grip and both of them are exchanging confused looks. Perry stands up from the bench and runs a hand through her bushy, red hair. It's ironic, but before LaFontaine can make a blunt comment about it, they catch that Perry's hands are almost the shade of her hair. They _are_ heating up.  


"LaF, please tell me you’re lying.” They’re not, and the way the ground is starting to shake underneath them is a sufficient answer. But then Perry locks worried eyes with them and the shaking ceases—there’s their anchor. “There’s nothing normal about what’s happening, isn’t it?”  


“It’s a distinct possibility.”

 

\--

 

Laura really was glad she didn’t know anyone in her classes. After her talk with SJ, it became clear what everyone was talking about behind her back. It was a relief that her classes were big enough so, in the case anyone did recognize her, she could hide.  


However, it was a different story back in the dormitories. And it hits her.  


She didn’t really notice until she slammed her dorm’s door to questioning neighbors and read the post-it note plastered on it that reads _‘freak’_ from her roommate—which she can recognize by her very neat handwriting. Now that she is where everyone knows what Laura Hollis, freshman surprise of the swim team, has done—where everyone is shamelessly calling her everything but her own name, she notices how lonely she really feels.  


She thinks about the people she has met on the few weeks of university. There’s her team, and those are out of the list obviously. There’s that kid she shared a table with on the busy dining center, but stopped talking to after he tried to hit on her. Her instructors are far from being her friends. She isn’t involved in any other clubs or organizations, and no one has really established a conversation with her in class. SJ is probably the only person she has a decent relationship with—or had. Even though Laura doesn’t trust SJ, she wonders if she at least still could count on her. She picks the note, crumples it and throws it aggressively at her window. So much for a nice roommate. Laura takes a peek from her door and when she sees no one out the hall, she decides to swiftly go to SJ’s room at the other side.  


The door is slightly open, and she can see SJ’s body slumped on the futon reading what looks like a psychology book. Laura moves enough to cause a creak that makes SJ jump and instantly has a deadpan stare on her. Maybe they’re not friends anymore.  


“I’m sorry,” Laura starts and she doesn’t really know what she’s apologizing for, but it made the look on SJ soften a little.  


“You know you can talk to me, Laura,” she sighs and stands up to offer a hand. “Come on in. I’m sure you don’t want people to round you up again, and I’m not about having seventy girls in my room either.” Laura did as she was told and let SJ guide her to the couch.  


She starts fidgeting her hands on her jeans and SJ covers them with hers. “Hey, I’m worried. And you’re right, I’ve been talking about you…” She pauses to collect her thoughts, but receiving a disappointed glare from Laura, she continues hesitantly. “But I won’t believe anything you don’t tell me. You just got to tell me, because I’m worried.” Laura still doesn’t know how to take her words, but that is not the biggest of her worries right now. She came to her for a friend. She needed to know she still had someone.  


“Are we really okay?” Laura asks so weakly it came out as a strangled whisper.  


“Of course!” She says as if it’s supposed to be obvious. Laura looks down at SJ’s hands over hers and feels sudden shame. SJ seems to notice and tries to meet Laura’s glare while shifting on the futon until she’s fully facing Laura and moves both hands to her shoulders. “I know you’re agitated, and it doesn’t help that you’re the trend of this floor, let alone the whole campus apparently, but—”  


“Gee, thanks,” she interrupts hurt, regretting this whole conversation altogether.  


“Sorry—fuck—sorry.” SJ drops her hands to Laura’s side, thinking of what to say next. She’s not making a very good case for a friend in Laura’s opinion. “I’m sorry for calling you a freak…behind your back.”  


Laura gives her a half smile and reaches for one of her hands and gives it a squeeze. Maybe she trusts SJ. Maybe it doesn’t have to be as complicated, and maybe if she talks about it—even though it makes it real—she can get a concrete explanation.  


“I lost control, SJ. I mean, it wasn’t intentional by any means, but I just lost control.”  


“What is _it_ , Laura? What did you lose control of?” Laura sighs a little frustrated. She doesn’t even know what _it_ is either, that’s the problem. She feels SJ’s worried look deepen, as if she can see how desperate Laura feels—and maybe she does, by how her hands go back to her shoulders trying to ground her.  


“You have no idea?” Laura shakes her head fighting back a sob, but SJ pulls her into a hug that completely defeats the purpose and she lets go. “I’m sorry,” she repeated as she was stroking Laura’s hair while she cried.  


“What if everyone’s right? I did almost kill my whole team.” She feels SJ tense in the embrace, but it’s gone as soon as it came.  


“If you say it wasn’t intentional, you should believe it. Don’t let anyone else cloud your mind.”  


“What do you think?” She almost chokes on her words. Laura _still_ doesn’t fully believe SJ, but if she were to confess she’s as terrified as everyone else might be, she wouldn’t be able to handle it.  


“It doesn’t matter what I think.” That is not a response, and Laura’s heart quickens.  


“Don’t give me that cr—” Laura starts but SJ cuts her off.  


“I believe you, ok? But that won’t help you. It's what you believe that matters.”  
  
Before Laura could respond, her obnoxious cellphone ringtone deafens her thoughts. Nobody calls Laura except her dad, so her heart skips a beat when she hears him utter her name as if he was shaking in the other end.  


“Laura…”  


“Dad?”  


“I’m sorry, honey.” The call ends, and before she can process what he could possibly be sorry about the building’s fire alarm goes off.  


“What was that?”  SJ breaks the silence and then they hear the floor-don, Charlie, yell and knock on every door _‘Come on guys, this looks like a real situation, and seventh floor is a long way to the ground!’_ They both look at each other with panic and jump from the futon to the door in a second. SJ opens her door and manages to get out without getting hit by the incoming girls. She lived in the room by the stairs, which kind of sucked in these situations. Laura follows to walk out and the three girls passing by right in front of her stopped on their tracks. One of them is another freshman from her swim team.  


“Hollis, are you trying to kill us again?” She winces, but doesn’t say anything. She limits to look at her teammate—probably ex-teammate—Lea. She has a cast on her arm, and she wants to say sorry…she really does, but it doesn’t look like it would make any difference. “I can’t swim again until who knows when thanks to you. So thanks,” she spits out and gives her a stern look. Laura tries her hardest to stare back, but only ends up shifting her eyes to the other two girls on either side of Lea, who were mimicking her actions. Once she goes back to Lea, she feels a shiver down her spine, and Laura genuinely thinks she might hit her. She’s taller than her by a longshot and it makes matters even worse. There’s nothing else but the alarm ringing on her ear, and it’s deafening. Lea’s approaching with that hard glare, as if she’s really about to slap her until Charlie breaks their trance.  


“Come on ladies! We don’t have time to chit-chat, this is serious.” She goes past them and opens the door signaling from them to head downstairs.  


“You’re a fucking freak, Hollis,” Lea whispers, but is loud enough to hear through the alarm—and probably loud enough for Charlie to hear. With one last look, the three girls enter the staircase and Laura finally moves five seconds after, mouthing a _‘thank you’_ but she stops her.  


“Remember that this is not high school, Laura. She has nothing on you. And you _know_ you can always report this kind of stuff to me.” She’s right, but also wrong in many ways.  


“She’s my friend.” _Was_ her friend. It’s the only excuse she can come up with though, but it’s not very convincing by the look Charlie is giving her.  


“Doesn’t look like one. Look, come on, we need to get out of here. You can stop by my room afterwards to talk about it.” Although she appreciates Charlie’s concern, it’s not something that can be solved by punishing Lea, or any other person who confronts her. It’s on her. She did this, whether she intended to or not. Maybe she does deserve the insults.  


They head downstairs without another word, and as soon as they’re out, Laura is met by many pairs of eyes on her. She’s definitely sure that ninety percent of this crowd had an idea of what she’s done. She decides to ignore them and walk to the nearest tree. She sits down and waits for the cue to go inside the dorms again.  


She scanned the group from her position and couldn’t see SJ. Maybe it was not okay to socialize in public, or maybe she freaked out about Laura’s half confession of her actions. Whatever it was, she wouldn’t blame her. Not at all.  


The alarm stopped after ten minutes and the firefighters came out of the building after five--another false fire alarm. After that, Charlie and the other floor-dons try to organize the group to go inside the building. At least that meant no more eyes on her. Laura finally gets up and as she’s about to join, something yanks her back, and before she knows it--before she’s able to cry for help--she’s in the backseat of a car already driving away from her building.  


“You’ll get your answers soon, Ms. Hollis.” It’s a voice she doesn’t recognize, but this person knows her and that might be a little reassuring. Just a little.

 

\--

 

They have been ignoring their parents call for an hour now and it’s been at least two hours since they sat on this bench. But LaFontaine was holding on to something more important right now, and they weren't going to be the one to end this peaceful moment.  


“You should answer. Your parents must be worried.” It was the first time Perry commented on the many calls they have received. Her tone was flat and raspy from crying. All of the sudden, a tragic thought came through their head, Perry would never ignore her parents like this--never would have. They only embrace her tighter.  


“I’m worried about you.”  


"And I'm worried about you, LaF. Look, I'm not sure what this means for both of us, but there is something wrong." Perry breathes in and out, as if she's scared to trigger herself like earlier, and LaFontaine can sense it. "I don't want you to experience the same as me." And LaFontaine knew what feeling she was referring to.  


"It was not your fault, we have gone over this." Apparently it was not the right thing to say, because Perry steps out of their embrace and a serious look floods her face. Too serious.  


"It's all I think about, LaF. Every single time, it comes back to me." LaFontaine tried to put a hand in her friend's shoulder to sympathize, but is shut down immediately. Their peaceful moment was definitely over.  


"You are incapable of doing such thing, Perr.”  


“But I did. I had no control of it, and I’m so afraid it’ll happen again.”  


“I won’t let that happen.” Perry scoffs at the comment, sounding annoyed almost.  


“You have yourself to worry about, dear. You can’t just take care of me when you’re going through the same thing.” Perry touches their shoulder sadly and, just like that, the contact is gone.  


“Then we’ll do it together.” Lafontaine is always so hopeful. Probably a little too hopeful, but that kept Perry’s hopes up too. Even if they’re hurting, she is always first and foremost.  


“I should be the one taking care of you.”  


What they haven’t noticed is that LaFontaine’s parents haven’t frantically called back like they always do when LaF ignores them. And, while they might have started looking for them, there isn’t a sign of them nearby. They _know_ about LaFontaine and Perry’s place in the park, and that would probably be the first place they’d look. Instead, a van has been parked a few feet away from their car waiting for them. There is a big, unfortunate chance that it might not be their parents.


	2. Watch me when I’m on my own (see me falling like the snow)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Or the one where they all meet and judge each other for a little bit before learning they will spend a lot of time together.

“Congratulations.” A man says as he practically sprinted by Carmilla and dropping something resembling money. She stops the music to take a peek and -  no, it was actual money. As Carmilla took a look at her bag, she caught a glimpse of not only one, but several $100 bills.  
  


Her breath catches violently as she couldn’t take her eyes off her bag. Then she notices a yellow New York MetroCard and picks it up. It has a sticky note to the other side reading, and her heart stops, _MEET ME OR ELSE_. Carmilla carefully brings her head up and looks around to make sure no one is after her. Not seeing anyone, she takes a deep breath, poises herself up and starts gathering her things into the bag.  
  


Once she gives a last look around, she heads up to the street and takes out a pack of cigarettes and, with shaky hands, manages to light one and smokes it in the hopes she isn’t deafened by the sound of her pounding heart anymore to think about her plan.  
  


\--  
  


“What am I exactly waiting for?” Laura has asked this question probably a hundred times, but she still doesn’t get an answer from either of the two people driving her around. She’s memorized all holes in the seat of the car, which sort of terrifies her, because some of them _really_ looked like bullet holes or something. Laura gets less comfortable the longer she’s in that car. “Am I going to die today?” This is the first time she asks that question.  
  


Both of her captors chuckle, and that makes Laura even more nervous. “Ms. Hollis, you shouldn’t judge people by what they drive.” She’s also memorized the voices, but it sounds nothing like anyone she knows, unfortunately. “I know we might look unsettling, but we’re just waiting for people to join you.” The passenger turns around and adds, “Now you can stop asking.”  
  


_More people to join you._ Laura has even more questions than before, which would defeat the purpose of staying silent. She noticed the passenger looking at her again, observing her confused look. “Okay, the people joining you are just like you. Well - almost.”  
  


“What does that even mean?” Laura propped closer to the front seats, but the guy turned around.  
  


“I can’t tell you anything else. You wouldn't believe _me_.”  
  


“Oh, I could believe anything by now.” She chuckles and goes back to her seat defeated. She knows she’s not going to get anything else.  
  


“Just be patient, Ms. Hollis.” Laura _can_ wait.  
  


\--  
  


Carmilla has always found control over breathing in and out. She used to count backwards to calm her anxiety. When that didn’t work, she turned to trying smoking, and that worked a little more. She found control over smoking, or so she thinks. At least the only thing she thinks she has control over these days.  
  


It’s really stupid, she thinks, but it hasn’t become a part of her - just something she does to relieve anxiety. Nothing more. After the stream of consciousness, Carmilla trashes the cigarette and goes downstairs to take the next metro train to...Grand Central, according a note stuck to the Metro Card she was given. She’s very close, just a couple of stations, so it shouldn’t take her long.  
  


There is that odd weight on her shoulders pressed by packs and packs of money. She doesn’t know what to do after getting to Grand Central, so she hopes someone is there to meet her. Carmilla is starting to sweat noticeably, and she’s glad the current stop is hers.  
  


“What would you do with that much money?” She feels an arm snake through her shoulder and practically freezes in the middle of Grand Central. “Keep walking with me Ms. Karnstein.” Her heart starts pounding again. Nobody knows her last name. Nobody - unless it’s someone from her past, but it isn’t a familiar voice at all. Probably even more terrifying, but she decides to not give in.  
  


“I dropped that name a long time ago.” She feels sweat on her back.  
  


“Ms. _Carmilla_ , then.” Now shivers down her spine. It seems that the person next to her notices, because he loosens the grip on her shoulder. “Hey,” He starts, and Carmilla can finally see his face. This person isn’t too much older than her and doesn’t look threatening at all. He’s even wearing a worried look on his face. “I’m not going to hurt you, or take you to anyone who will…” He continues softly, and Carmilla can finally start breathing more normally. She’s still mildly shaking, but starting to compose herself. “You _have_ to come with me though.” The more this person talked, the more at ease she felt, so she decided to go with it.  
  


“I mean, I already am so…” Carmilla shrugs, an acknowledgement look by the guy next to her follows and silence ensues as they kept walking out the station.  
  


“What’s your name? Clearly you know mine, so it’ll just make it easier to stay on your side if I know yours.” Carmilla breaks the silence as they reach the top of the stairs to the streets, wondering if this is someone she will see again.  
  


“You never answered my question though.”  
  


“What ques-” She was about to protest, but gets interrupted almost immediately  
  


“What would you do with all that money you _just_ lost?” Carmilla stops on her tracks to grab her back. No bag. However, when she turns to her side, she can see it strapped to the guy’s shoulders instead. She wonders when that could have possibly happened. “Scared the crap out of you, huh?” He chuckles.  
  


“Not funny.” She starts. After a brief pause and resuming to their trail, Carmilla responds, “I would use it to get far, far away from here and start a new life. Go to another country even, and whatever I have left I’d-”  
  


“Donate it to charity?” He interrupts again, and she nods. “You seem like a good person.” He says it genuinely, and she can feel his words sting. If only he knew. “Kirsch.” It is said too fast and Carmilla gives him a confused look. “That’s my name - well, last name. I dropped my name a long time ago too.” And now she’s surprised. She doesn’t bother asking the possible reason behind that because she wouldn’t give that to him either. She just nods and wonders about his story. Then, she realizes this might not be the first and only time they’ll see each other.  
  


“I _am_ going to see you again, aren’t I?”  
  


“Indeed. But I can’t tell you anything else, so I need you to get in the car.” Carmilla didn’t realize it, but Kirsch seems to have called a taxi, because it was pulling up next to them as he talked. She got in and waited.  
  


“Ready, Kirsch?” The man driving says.  
  


“We’re ready.” He finally gets in. “Don’t worry, Carmilla, we’re getting far away from here.” Her weariness dissipates slowly with wonder.  
  


\--  
  


“I don’t want to scare you, but I think someone is following us, Perr.” LaFontaine whispers while shifting in their seat.  
  


It took them about five minutes to figure it out from the first time they saw the van parked by them. It also looked very cliche - white van, tinted windows and a logo of some odd cleaning service of who-knows-what on the side. They weren’t sure if anyone has been in or out of the van yet, but they could feel something wasn’t right. They briefly turn around to check again. Nothing has changed.  
  


“Could you take a quick peek?” LaFontaine asks to a pensive Perry. She turns her head and comes back.  
  


“Do you think your parents have anything to do with it?” It didn’t look right to Perry either.  
  


“I think the police would be here instead of these predictable undercover idiots. I’m not crazy then? You think it’s weird too?” LaFontaine turns to fully face Perry on the bench.  
  


“Completely. I say we approach to that car.”  
  


“And hand ourselves to some unknown doom? Are you okay, Perr?” They put both hands on Perry’s neck and forehead to check for signs of delusion. _What?_  
  


“Confrontation can work against kidnappers.” Perry grabs both hands and positions them on their laps as she takes another look.  
  


“Says who?” It comes a little harsher than they meant it to be, but before they start apologizing, Perry interrupts their thought.  
  


“We need to get to your car to get out of here anyway. Come on.”  
  


As Perry stands up, LaFontaine joins her while checking their phone. No new calls or texts. Strange. “Perr, can you check your phone and see if someone has tried to contact you?”  
  


All Perry sees are texts from all kinds of people _‘time heals all wounds’, ‘I’m so sorry for your loss’, ‘stay strong’_ \- she stopped and limited herself to just look at the incoming names, nothing from LaFontaine’s parents. She then gets hit back to reality wondering what she should respond to these people. It doesn’t last long when she feels LaFontaine’s arm around her shoulders. A brief pause followed with, “Shit, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have made you look.” Typically, LaFontaine was observant enough to figure out the situation around them.  
  


“It’s okay,” Perry responds with a sad smile. “There is nothing from your parents here either though.”  
  


They walk more towards the car and LaFontaine catches a glimpse of someone moving inside the passenger seat. “Move faster to the car.” They urge.  
  


It seems impossible, but just as they are about to hit the car’s doors, they are already surrounded by three people. “You two need to come with us.”  
  


“And why exactly would we want to do that?” LaFontaine starts while crossing their arms and trying to put the most intimidating look they have. They might be outnumbered, but these people don’t look intimidating at all for them.  
  


“Look. We’re sorry this looks sketchy, and if we seem to bother you, but-”  
  


“Bother us? You have been watching our every move for who knows how long. You’re not only bothering us, but you’re also downright disturbing.” They continue and take a deep breath to stand tall against them.  
  


“We can’t explain now, but it is very, very important for you to let us take you.” LaFontaine chuckles, as if this is the most ridiculous thing they have ever been told. “It is for your own good. Please.” The stranger adds. And when the silence is too long and no one has moved since, he seems to become exasperated and sighs. “We would take you to a place that would allow you to explore your powers.” Both Perry and LaFontaine look at each other with wide eyes and then back at the three people around them - where the woman of the group just smacked the guy talking to them while shooting a glare at him and whispering “Idiot.” She steps forward.  
  


“Okay, we can’t tell you anything else, but you really do need to come with us.” She is incredibly tall, redheaded like Perry, and LaFontaine starts to wonder if the whole things is just a stupid dream.  
  


“What about my friend’s parents?” Perry finally speaks quietly. “We are headed home.”  
  


“It’s been taken care of.” The answer doesn’t seem to satisfy neither of them, so she adds, “That’s why they haven’t been looking for you anymore.”  
  


“How did you kn-” LaFontaine is surprisingly interrupted by Perry.  
  


“You promise you have answers for us.” She sounds desperate now. Her voice quivers with fear and slight hope as this might help them understand the horrible things happening around them recently. “If we agree to get into your creepy car, take us to creepy town with more creepy people, you’ll have answers for us, is that what you are saying?”  
  


“Essentially.” The woman’s voice is reassuring enough for Perry to comply, so she turns to LaFontaine.  
  


“Ready for some creepy answers?” The fear looks gone all of the sudden, but LaFontaine knows what’s going through Perry’s head at this moment. She has been desperate for answers and they have too, so the prospect of getting them is probably the only thing cheering Perry up today. But to take off with a group of stranger for just said possibility - this is unlike Perry at all, but they know she needs this.  
  


They take a step forward towards the other woman, with their arms still crossed. “How do I know you’re not just making things up?” They had to tilt their head up a little to level with the woman.  
  


“You need help figuring out what has happened to you in the past few weeks, and we are the ones who can provide you with some enlightenment on this _hell_ you just unleashed upon yourselves. I get it.” This makes LaFontaine drop their arms and the woman smiles at the sight of relaxation. “At least I’m glad that this is going better than the time I was taken. I kicked my guy in the stomach and tried to run away.” LaFontaine just looks at her dumbfounded. “I’m just glad you two seem more reasonable. So now, if you let me, we need to take you as soon as possible.”  
  


Perry steps into the van as the doors open, but right before getting in, LaFontaine grabs her gently by the wrist while approaching to her and whispering into her ear, “They better have answers, because I will be doing more than kicking her in the stomach.” Perry chuckles. Typical LaFontaine behaviour.  
  


\--  
  


“What was the ‘else’?” Carmilla asks Kirsch.  
  


“Excuse me?”  
  


“Your note said: _'meet me or else.’_ What would have happened if I didn’t meet you at Grand Central?”  
  


“Oh!” He paused for a few seconds before responding. Carmilla almost starts to worry until, “I honestly have no idea. I assumed you’d come either way.” She thinks she has just met the most brilliant idiot there is.  
 

“Kirsch likes to seem intimidating. Never the case though.” The driver states frankly, which earned him a look from Kirsch. She believes it.  
 

“The money is yours though. That wasn’t a joke. But you won’t be able to use it for some time.” He fully turns and talks to Carmilla very seriously. As if he knew her life story.  
 

Before she could respond, one of their phones ring and Kirsch answers. “Hey D!” He pauses and rolls his eyes. “Do we finally have them all? Perfect! Are we meeting beforehand?” He then sighs disappointed. “Okay. I’ll see you there then. Bye, D.” Carmilla observed the interaction, but it’s enough to figure out who ‘D’ could be. She doesn’t ask though. She might find out anyway.  
 

“Take it we’ll go straight to Silas?”  
  


“Danny said so.” He sounds a little defeated.  
  


“Anything to not piss her off again.”  
  


Kirsch turns to Carmilla again, “Something kind of crazy, _but_ cool is about to happen, so don’t freak out, okay?” She raises an eyebrow in confusion, but he takes it as an answer. “Dude, let’s go!”  
  


It all happens too fast and all of the sudden Carmilla isn’t looking out the New York City streets anymore, but just some terrain and a big building in front of her. They are not in a car anymore, and as soon as she notices, her head and stomach spin. She also feels a lump on her throat.  
  


“Well, she’s totally going to throw up.” And so she does.  
  


“Classic.”  
  


\--  
  


“What is this place?” Laura asked in the hopes she would finally get answers.  
  


“Silas Academy. You’ll learn a lot here. Maybe even how to stop being so impatient.”  
  


They start heading in when she sees two other groups come in. She wonders if they are here for the same unknown reason she is and decides to approach them. “Do you know why we’re here?” She whispers to a distracted Carmilla who jumps at the sudden presence.  
  


Carmilla turns to her and pauses for a brief second to compose herself. “You might kill me before we find out.” She has a pale complexion and weary eyes. The quick travel might have affected others in different ways, Laura thought.  
  


“I’m Laura, by the way. I’m assuming we’ll get to know each other anyway if we’re staying here, and...” She stops herself as the gaze she’s holding turns a little heavy. She immediately notices something very different in Carmilla’s eyes - something somber, and it intrigues her. It intrigues her a lot. But she might need to wait to learn why. So she continues, “...I was hoping we could get a head start.” Laura extends her hand with a half smile as they are still walking towards the building.  
  


\--  
  


Carmilla goes from looking at Laura’s eager expression to her hand a couple of times before taking it. “Carmilla.” It’s all she managed to say with her head still pounding and everything else in her body revolting. But it all feels like going up again.  
  


“Whenever I feel nauseous, I think about flying. Everything loses its weight, turning lighter instead of heavier…” Carmilla tried to visualize it but it backfired. “Maybe it works differently for people? Sorry.” She composes herself quicker this time.  
  


“That’s okay. Next time I’ll try it earlier, cupcake.” Carmilla shoots a half smile to a worried, now blushed Laura. It also sort of surprised her, as the nickname just slipped, and it will probably stick.  
  


“Cool.”  
  


They are now at the entrance of the Academy, and are greeted by a tall redhead and starts with, “You are finally here, yay. Endearing.” With such a monotone tone that Carmilla almost thinks she’s a robot. It is a strong possibility, as her body looks slick, toned, strong and perfect. This girl could probably destroy her, and she’s almost afraid of her. It must be the Danny Kirsch was talking about. “We have a lot of things to get done before you get your answers, so let’s start right away.” She moves to the side and signals to the door for everyone to get in.  
  


When people say academy, Carmilla has always pictured something out of the Harry Potter universe minus the magic and creatures, but the place she is currently looking at seems far away from that. There is a schedule and numbers at every other wall and doors appear out of nowhere for people to step in or out of. This is way more than she imagined and way more modern. And she just realized she was at some sort of lobby, because they stop at a security scanner.  
  


“My name is Danny Lawrence,” She stops and points at someone behind Carmilla--Kirsch. “And this is Kirsch. We will be helping you transition into your new routine. Firstly, you all have a conflicting thing in common, and we are here to help you control it.” She looks at Kirsch, as if waiting for him to talk, but he is clueless. She rolls her eyes defeated. “What Kirsch is trying to say is that, to get you started, you all need to get your first screening. Super simp--” Kirsch then interrupts.  
  


“Oh, yes! Screening. If you want to get all your possessions out of wherever you have them, we’ll take care of that and dispose of them. Nothing can stay with you.” Kirsch has her money, so she’s not worried about that. However, the person next to her, Laura, seems to not be too pleased about the situation.  
  


\--  
  


Laura was not pleased with the situation at all. She unconsciously reaches to her pocket for her phone. She can’t lose it. “We can’t keep anything?”  
  


“Nope. There can’t be any track of you or means of contact for other people. It is also easier to detach yourself from your old life.” He says very seriously. _Old life_. She wonders what would happen to everyone else in her life. Do they have to forget about her? “It sounds terrible, I know, but it is all for the best, and a rule to treat everyone equally.” Kirsch sounds a little nostalgic, and she wonders what he has had to give up.  
  


“Come on, let’s start,” Danny breaks the silence. “Laura Hollis, we’ll get you first.” So she approaches them and gets everything out of every pocket she has, except her cellphone. They notice. “What are you holding?” Laura closes her eyes and holds her breath, and finally caves.  
  


“I can’t get rid of this.” She feels heavy at the thought and seeks help in Danny’s gaze.  
  


“...Why?” Danny is between annoyed and intrigued to hear from Laura.  
  


“Memories.”  
  


“You see, the whole point of getting rid of your belongings is because we want you to disconnect from your memories. So that wouldn’t help.”  
  


“I can’t. I need it.” Her heart is pounding, and it almost feels like she could explode at any moment.  
  


“Okay, Laura. Give me a valid reason and I might consider it.” Everyone was looking at them, and Laura felt really, really uncomfortable. She is to the verge of crying when Danny gets closer to her and points at her ear. “I need to understand in order to help you.”  
  


She isn’t embarrassed, and she shouldn’t be. But the thought of disclosing her vulnerabilities with anyone right now petrified her. She needed to keep her phone though, so she approached Danny’s ear. “My mother is in it. The last thing I have from her is on my phone, and I can’t just get rid of it.” It comes out too fast she was worried she had to repeat herself. But Danny just pulls away and looks at her for a solid minute, with her face softening in the process.  
  


“Don’t ever use it for anything else. I’m trusting you here.” She simply says sternly, and Laura almost hugs her. _Almost_ \- that would be a terrible idea. So she just mouths a quick _thanks_ and moves to Kirsch.  
  


“She’s never done that. _Ever._ Pull up your hands, please.” He starts while moving a detector around her body. “Some advice, never get on her bad side. She could kill you.”  
  


“I’m right next to you, Kirsch.” They both laugh. And finally Kirsch lets her go under the stationary security scanner and officially become a part of the Silas Academy. Really scary to think about.  
  


\--  
  


“Cigarettes could kill you.” Danny says as she inspects Carmilla’s belongings and she feels anxious. She’s not too thrilled to give them up though, so she wonders…  
  


"Doubtful. I've been doing pretty well so far. I’ll need them though. _Can I keep them?_ ” She tries to imitate Laura as best as possible in hopes Danny considers her dumb request. She also feels like she could _really_ use one of them right at this moment. But, as she expected, the red head isn't amused.  
  


“Nice try, but that’s not happening.” Danny chuckles. That sound unconsciously annoys Carmilla and sighs before fighting back.  
  


“You let the cupcake over there keep her stuff for whatever reason.” Danny stops on her tracks while hitting the table in front of her and examines Carmilla's defiant expression. Danny Lawrence could really be more scary than she seems.  
  
“You’re walking on mighty thin ice, Carmilla. Don’t push me.” She grabs the pack of cigarettes and pulverizes them on the spot. Impressive and infuriating at the same time. "Go on."  
  


"I'll see what I can do," She says moving on to Kirsch, and whispering "Xena." So low she thinks she gets away with it. However, she isn't completely sure and almost regrets it. This is going to be an interesting experience, she thinks. She also wonders what Laura could have said to shake such a stoic being.

**Author's Note:**

> theotherbroodinglover on tumblr, in case you are into social media and want to follow this fic I just decided to FINALLY start. Let me know your first impressions. I promise there is a lot more to be explained and will be explained.


End file.
